Showing posts with label Dance with a lampshade on your head if you really mean business. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Dance with a lampshade on your head if you really mean business. Show all posts

Sunday, June 13, 2010

A "Rutebega Awakening" or, "Burp me you fool" - it's your choice!

It had been a terrific vacation but now it was time for Mr. Slug to put on his tie and go back to work. He had become spoiled on his cruise to the Bahamas, and found that it was hard to get back into the swing of waking up early for the daily battle.  Mr Slug had become accustomed to sliding out of his stateroom, along the banister to the Lido Deck and straight to the salad bar, which was open all hours of the day and night for the guests enjoyment. "Ahhh, this is the life," thought Mr. Slug, as he made the most of his six days at sea. Mr. Slug enjoyed golfing, swimming and playing Baccarat in the ship casino. When it came time to disembark the ship, Mr. Slug found himself sliding very slowly and reluctantly down the gangway and back to his life as a working slug. Mr. Slug was now tanned and fit after his week of luxury! "Things are gonna change at work," thought Mr. Slug to himself. "All we have to eat at the office is soda and candy out of the machine. I think I will call a meeting to address this very serious situation."  When Mr. Slug returned to the office on Monday morning, he sent summons to his top producing slimers that a meeting would be called to order immediately. The group of executive slugs met each other in the hallway, next to the food machine. The execs looked at Mr. Slug curiously, as he had never called a meeting outside of the closed doors of the executive slugroom. Mr. Slug said, "I have called you here today for a very serious threat to our productivity, this junkfood machine that spits out foods that slow us down and make us sleepy." Mr. Slug handed out a photo of a juicy looking rutebega to drive the point home. He began, " A slug is naturally tuned to eating large amounts of healthy greens all day long. The work day does not always allow for healthy choices on the slide. Just say no to heavily salted snack foods, they will shrivel a nice soft belly and decrease your overall productivity. For this reason, I have ordered the snack vending company to change our order to only the most succulent greens and tasty fruits and vegetables. I believe we will see an increase in our sales numbers almost immediately, which should help to defray the higher costs of the contents of this snack machine. All slugs in agreement will say Aye."  Mr. Slug waited for a moment and was pleased with the overwhelming number of  "Aye's"  from his fellow businessslugs. Mr. Slug continued, "Think of what we can do, my fellow slugs, if all of our meetings start with a hearty meal? Gentleslugs, we have lot's of work to do now that I am back, and as far as I am concerned, it's officially CRUNCH TIME! Quick! Call the Chamber of Commerce! Let's let the entire business community know that this company has officially GONE GREEN!" A great amount of whooping and hollering could be heard throughout the halls that fine Monday morning, and the slugs were more productive, due to the new produce. More lettuce for everybody!!!! Wooohooo!!