Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Take off your lampshade when you dance or you might get arrested!

     It is all well and good that a hard working sales team can go out in public after a long day of negotiating and have an adult libation with dinner, but the libations should end withing a reasonable time after the dinner is eaten, if the celebrating takes place on a worknight.
     Mr. Canopener received a call from his friends, a single, nervous sounding telephone call from a noisy payphone in the holding tank of the County Jail where the two scofflaws, Messrs. Lunchbox and his party cohort Mr. Thermos were lodged for the evening. Here is what Mr. Canopener learned from the call: They apparently went out after a successful day of work. Mr. Thermos got the signatures for a very large order of slug muzzles, went back to the hotel and promptly persuaded Mr. Lunchbox to "go out to a restaurant and celebrate." Mr. Lunchbox was pleased as punch that his protege had landed the account all by himself. "I shant deny you your moment of glory," said he, and they marched across the street to the local tavern and took two seats at the well worn bar. "I'll take three drinks, two for my friend and a double for me."
     About two hours later, Mr. Lunchbox was dancing with a broom and Mr. Thermos was wearing a lampshade on his head with his tie wrapped around the top. The barkeep called the cops after Mr. Thermos hopped up onto the bar and started to twirl about in a wild and dangerous fashion. He lost his screw-on cap when he slipped on the olive tray, sending the now loosened cap hurtling through the air and out the door of the establishment, landing right in the backseat of the cop car, where the rest of him ended up alongside the whimpering and apologetic Mr. Lunchbox who pleaded pitifully for freedom, but to no avail. They were caught, red handled!
When Mr. Slug got the news from Mr. Canopener, he was rightly annoyed, but sympathetic as well. His two finest sales associates had been blowing off some steam, and at least they had only hopped across the street from the hotel and had not attempted to drive anywhere, much to their credit. They had, however, embarrassed themselves on a business trip, and for this they must be reprimanded. This is not the first occasion they have seen trouble! Remember what happened on New Years Eve! Mr. Slug has decided that he shall accompany the team on the next sales trip, and the only kind of celebrating they will do after landing a new account will be a nice game of Scrabble in the lobby of the hotel, and a cup of hot tea before bedtime! No lampshades were harmed in the filming of this movie.

3 comments:

Owen said...

Oh No ! Not again ! Those two just can't seem to stay out of trouble... perhaps they should be made to wear a chastity version of the slug muzzle, with a padlock on it, so they won't be able to drink down copious amounts of libations when Mr Slug is not around ???

Bailing them out is going to get tiresome after a while if they keep up the shenanigans...

Just wanted to let you know I'll be away for a couple of weeks, sliding away on a little vacation... I wish you and Mr Slug all the best at Slug's Rest, and I'll be by when we get back from our little excursion...
:-)

Angela Lovell said...

Good help is sooooo hard to find - I know this!

Ginger said...

Lost his screw on cap!?! My goodness.
I suppose one should take off their lampshade when they dance, unless of course they are a lamp and then of course they could be arrested for exposing their bare bulb.
Thanks for sliding over to the sea now and again, your comments are always so lovely.