Friday, April 9, 2010

"A clean slug is an effective slug!" That said, "An effective slug is not afraid of a little dirt!"

There is nothing worse than waking up early on a frosty morning to find that the water heater has failed and you will be taking a cold shower. This happened to Mr. Slug recently, and he was not a happy slider. Mr. Slug woke up all of the sleeping slugs and told them to apply as much warm belly surface as possible to the outside of the haplesss household appliance. The slugs did as they were told, and in about 30 minutes, Mr. Slug found himself happily soaping up his mantle for another days work.  Order was restored to Slug's Rest, which had a very positive effect on the rest of Mr. Slug's business day! Mr. Slug felt so satisfied by the warm shower that he was giddy with happy feelings and greeted everybody he met that day with a hearty "Howyadoin!" and a spritely flick of the tail. This created an optimum condition for doing a brisk business.....At his morning meetings, Mr. Slug's customers were pleasantly accosted with the fresh, airy scent of Irish Spring soap upon his person. They were enchanted with his easy, breezy sales approach. In fact, he felt so good that week that that he made three extra sales, which amounted to a significant increase in slime to be deposited in to the sluggy bank account! Mr. Slug always gives back to his community, so he rewarded each of the helpful slugs with a fresh bottle of foaming slug wash and a loofah back scratcher with a nice long wooden handle for those hard to reach areas of the tail.

9 comments:

Owen said...

Ah these priceless glimpses of the true life of slugs ! How could anyone survive without them ?

Yet another aspect of slug life that I'd never given any thought to, but my my, what a challenge it must be for any conscientious slug to stay clean and dry through out the day... with the neverending perpetual supply of slime constantly produced to allow slugs to advance in their travels, what soap could possibly be effective for long ? But in any case, am very happy to hear Mr Slug's sales are prospering, that is good news in these hard times...

And if slugs have to prepare tax returns at the same time humans do in some countries, I wish you all stamina and courage to affront the horribly incomprehensible documents and forms produced by the Infernal Slugagoo Service...
:-)

Snowbrush said...

Now, the question is whether Mr. Slug will pay to have the water heater repaired or save money by making the rest of you warm it with your bodies.

babbler said...

Owen,
Thanks for your observation about slug goo being hard to keep clean. It is a constant battle of hygiene for us, we appreciate the moral support, and of course, nice warm water to bathe in when we have become to sticky to slide. A clean slug has an easier time of it. Takling the Infernal Slugagoo Service is possibly the stickiest thing a slug can do!

babbler said...

Snowbrush,
As you have correctly surmised, Mr. Slug has no intention of throwing good goo after bad on a new water heater that will break down just like the current one. He has ordered the slugs to work in round the clock shifts, which they are more than happy to do since they all enjoy a warm scrubby on the belly. Thank you for your comments, we slide for them and wag our tails vigorously!

Snowbrush said...

"Thank you for your comments, we slide for them and wag our tails vigorously!"

All for me? I'm honored.

babbler said...

Yes, Mr. Snowbrush, All for you! Your comments are very special to us slugs, it is always enjoyable to read your missives. Wishing you a smooth slide today, Mrs. Slug

DCW said...

Slugs as a source of alternative clean energy!

Who knew?

WV "pbeddles" - little slugs nocturnally incontinent?

Owen said...

Ahhh, now where have you slugs slid off to ???

Was thinking of you when I saw a little poem just now on a blog about your cousins the snails...

http://julia-kneale.blogspot.com/2010/04/snail.html

Hope all is well at slug rest !

RMKK said...

Argh, plumbing problems! We just had the water heater replaced along with the bathroom and kitchen sink fixtures.

Marlene
http://rmkkfans.blogspot.com/