Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Sometimes you just gotta "make do"....or in this particular court case, it's a "make don't"

Mr. Slug likes his vegetables, but even he has his moments of weakness when he will raid the refrigerator late at night, looking for some tempting treat to eat while he watches his special DVD collection that he bought  on EBAY last month. It is every episode of Miami Mice ever made, all five action packed seasons, which have been cleverly and attractively packaged in a cream colored and textured alligator skin box. The only thing that would have made it even better would be if each CD were autographed with a claw print of Mr. Slug's favorite actor who plays "Elvis" in the popular long running television show.

When Mrs. Slug tried to Make Mr. Slug's lunch this fine morning, she was dismayed to find that there were very few lunch items from which to fashion a suitable noonday meal for her beloved mollusk. Mrs. Slug did what all good wives would do in this situation, she cobbled together a substitute lunch made of alternative ingredients! What a smart slug she is! Instead of bread, she put in some nice crackers. Instead of lettuce, she bagged a few frozen peas which would thaw nicely by lunchtime. Instead of an orange, she popped a few vitamin C tablets, which trickled noisily to the bottom of Mr. LunchBag, who was employed because Mr. LunchBOX was completely horrified by the entire business and hopped away in a huff, refusing to be associated with the alternate lunch plan!

Poor Mr. Slug. He has become a very spoiled slug who expects his lunch to look and taste a certain way, and this substitute fare did not cut the mustard as far as his palette was concerned. But who's fault was that I ask you, my dear readers, was it the fault of Mrs. Slug, who does her very best to accomodate the lunch needs of her loving husband slug? I say no, it was the fault of a certain late night snack attack by the very hungry and demanding belly of a certain Mr. Slug!

Your Honor, the defense rests.


Owen said...

I fear that Mrs Slug may be in need of a highly talented, articulate, slugvocate lawyer to defend her, as Mr Slug could rightfully argue that were Mrs Slug truly a comprehensive and foresightful mollusk, she would have had a second refrigerator hidden in the basement with a padlock on it, with an extra supply of yummy lunch rations in it, so that no matter what might befall the public bait stowed in the kitchen fridge, placed there to tempt late night snackers with gratifying treats, that a proper lunch could still be prepared at any time, even if the kitchen fridge had been emptied by marauding midnight mollusks...

Yes, a bright barrister slug may be required to deflect such attacks... and to help preserve mollusk marital harmony...

babbler said...

Thanks for sliding by! I have employed a talented barrister esquire slug for this occaision, and also for some unfortunate slugs who have gotten themselves in to a bit of trouble during a vacation, which you will see in the next installment of adventures. Right now, it is drink and not food that has caused quite a ruckus amongst the group of marauding slugs! Please read the latest incident and you will see that the barrister will be very busy this summer! Thanks again for your much appreciated two cents worth of goo!
Mrs. Slug

Hammy said...

Would've thought that only the green, leafy variety of vegetables would have been on the menu.