Sunday, July 25, 2010

Attention 101: pre-requisite course of study for all advanced classes

Recently, Mr. Slug has expressed a desire to expand his horizons and go back to school. This has been a very difficult decision to make as he is already a very busy businesslug and fitting classes into the executive schedule seems almost impossible. Mrs. Slug has encouraged this momentus decision and has enjoyed opening up the math book on the dining room table of late, doing math problems while nibbling a bowl of greens with her husband slug.   She noticed he was very tired and sent him to the sleeping chamber early because Mrs. Slug knows that he is liable to have a Pop Quiz at class.

Mr. Slug found himself feeling groggy in class the next day, and just as suspected, the teacher called a Pop Quiz on the class. The teacher said, "Sylvester Slug wanted to buy 4 basil leaves at his favorite vegetable stand. Sylvester slid across town at an average speed of  3 1/2 m.p.h. and covered a distance of 16 miles. How long did it take for Sylvester Slug to slide?"

Optical tentacles forward all you slugs! You have five minutes to solve the problem. Please use a number two pencil and use the comment section to record your answers.

Ready, Set, GO!

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

I should have stayed out of school.......the conclusion of the 4 part lecture series!

The slugs have all spent a night in the pokey and are now free to continue their vacation, but first, they have been ordered by the court to go to sliding school! Let this be a lesson to all of you slugs out there who do not consider the cause and effect of overindulgence while traveling by means of public transportation. I know it is your vacation and that you are expecting to have a good time, but please remember to slide responsibly or this could happen to you! Oh the horror!

When you're on a roll, nothing can stop your forward progress!

About an hour in to the flight, things started getting really out of hand. The bottles were rolling up and down the isles and the authorities were notified to meet the plane where the slugs and bottles were all taken into custody upon arrival to the gate.

There is no place to hide on an airplane

As you can see, the slugs have introduced Mr. Rum Bottle to the two brothers, Coca and Cola, who are now begininning to feel a bit tipsy. The slugs have had a "few too many," and have attracted the flight attendant, who is not at all pleased with the disruptive behavior.

Some things should remain in a glass by itself!

Summer is a time for vacationing slugs to buy an airline ticket headed to a favorite destination. This past week, a group of slugs decided to cut loose and fly to Los Angeles, California for some good old fashioned Fourth of July fun in the sun!  This particular group of slugs like to work hard, and play hard. They call themselves the "Sky sliders" and go to a different locale together every year. They are an unruly bunch of slugs, giggling as they take their seats. When the drinks cart rolls by, they will not be the ones ordering coffee and working on the crossword puzzle - they are the slugs who are planning to start the festivities the minute the airplane levels off at a cruising altitude.
In this episode, Mr. Rum Bottle rolls himself unsteadily up the gangway, boards the plane and attempts to meet up with two likely looking comrades, the Brothers Coca and Cola, who are a naturally sweet pair of frequent fliers and have no real desire to get mixed up with this bottle of potential trouble. The "Sky sliders" are seated in the exit row across from Mr. Rum Bottle. The group of slugs are feeling quite chipper and want to encourage the meeting of these bottled individuals sitting nearby. Stay tuned and keep that seatbelt tightened around your belly, as I think we might be in for a bit of turbulence during our flight!