Monday, January 17, 2011

Sir, your crazy machine malfunctioned and got soap in my mouth. I want a refund!

Slugs Rest was all in a thither this morning due to one certain slug who insists upon taking a verrrrr-r-r-r-y long shower and using up all of the hot water.  When Mr. Slug slid in to the shower and was greeted with a shockingly C-c-c-cold stream of water, he realized that there might be a market for his newest invention, a washing station for slugs! This idea is not new, however, a standard car wash is too abrasive for a soft bellied slug. The newer brushless carwash will still give a slug a set of pink stripes on his flanken steak.
Mr. Slug feels strongly that his "slide in, suds up and slide out" franchise will become all the rage, once the local slugs realize that they no longer have to wait for siblings to finish up in the bathroom in order for them to get going in the morning.
Mr. Slug is daydreaming, illusions of granduer sparkle in his eyes......"I can see it now, the Scrub-a dub-dubs will be located nextdoor to coffee kiosks and supermarkets across the land! Long lines of stinky slugs will be cleaned up and looking slick for work, thus increasing productivity in the workplace. I, the great and clever Mr. Slug will be invited to speak at wealth building seminars and college graduation ceremonies! I can hardly wait!!!"
Oh looks like Mr. Slug will HAVE to wait until Mrs. Slug finishes up. She is busy taking a shower and poor Mr. Slug hasn't finished the prototype yet...........This could take awhile!

Monday, January 3, 2011

Nog, Nog! Who's there?........Nobody! Hope you have enjoyed my stay!

Happy New Year to all of Mr. Slugs fellow sliders!!! It is always exciting to greet a fresh new year with enthusiasm and verve, but alas, there is one event that Mr. Slug has to face in the month of January that is perhaps even more painful than his customary "better late than never" late post of Christmas cards, sent on the 26th of December.......

Please note the unbidden tear eminating from Mr. Slugs sad eye....he is about to say goodbye to his favorite holiday visitor, the Holiday Carton of Eggnog!  She has packed her bags, squared her jaw, and snapped her purse shut in preparation for a long vacation, away from the hustle and bustle of the Christmas season.  Mr. Slug is concerned that the only eggnog left in the stores in a few days will be the short dated, bloated looking cartons of "flavored" eggnog, such as the pumpkin spiced or vanilla, or worse yet, the eggnog made of soy milk or the "reduced fat" variety. Oh, the horror!